Village Life

I think I may have finally come to terms with life in the village. Although I still standby the belief that this lifestyle is not for me, I do respect it and see its value. What continues to astonish me is how little it has changed in the last century. Whether that is because of peoples’ unwillingness or lack of desire for change or from a serious neglect on part of the government I will never know. More or less though, life in the bush is fairly predictable and stable, though without many commodities, and I think that has its certain appeals.

At first glance, it is easy to write off the rural community as underdeveloped and in need of a lot of aid. However, that ignores many of the inner-workings of these local societies. Mud huts with grass-thatched roofs are the norm, at least in my area. To an American, they look dismal. I could never imagine my mother or my sister living in a house that has actual dirt for walls alongside rats. However, these homes are extremely economical. They make use of the resources that are around, are extremely cheap to construct, and stay very cool in the equatorial heat while keeping you warm at night. Isn’t this the one with nature that hippies are always talking about? Now there is very often no electricity and that does inhibit a lot of growth for communities, including health and education deficits. But life is simple and people do not need a lot. Time is consumed by how long it takes to cook and clean everything, including the time it takes to walk to the local borehole and pump for water. Most of the food the family needs to eat or to sell for money is either right in the backyard or in a neighbor’s backyard whom they share with. Everyone in the community knows one another intimately, so it is like having an extremely large and close family who will all put together the little resources they have to send the kids to school or save someone’s life who is in the hospital. Everyone greets everyone else, because why not. It makes perfect sense to want to talk to people you know and catch up on what’s new in their life. When a family member dies, it is not uncommon for the entire village, hundreds of people, to come and support the family. With everyone contributing a small amount, it becomes easy for the family to feed everyone and get by for the weeks of grieving without working. Those same family members are all buried on the family land so it is easy to remember them and feel like they are close by. Local politics keeps things moving and make sure everyone does what they are supposed to. Instead of threatening people with jail, possible isolation from the entire network of support keeps crime low.

Life in the village is not all sunshine and candy. It is hard work and there is a severe lack of resources and opportunity. Most schools are poorly run, healthcare is virtually nonexistent, superstition prospers, education is extremely low, and people do not make enough money to save or grow as a family. So there are tradeoffs. But what I once saw as boring, simple, backwards, and poor, I now see a little differently and have respect for the people living there. The busyness and lack of friendliness in urban areas seems a little less desirable. Not to mention all the delicious, fresh food that is everywhere. I do feel lucky to live in a house that is safe, well-constructed, and has water and electricity. I am not quite ready to give up those comfortabilities for months at a time. But having to go weeks without either has taught me that I can survive without them, in fact millions do. And I really do appreciate my time spent just sitting with neighbors and eating lunch amongst family with food grown and prepared by their own hands. Running water is very clearly a luxury and I hope to remain aware of just how much drinking water is wasted in everyday life in America. All I can say is that if there was a nuclear disaster and we had to start over, these people would know exactly how to survive and people in America would turn barbaric.

The Strength of Women

If there is one topic that I had certain ideas about before coming but have drastically changed since living in Uganda, it is on the strength of women. In America, it is easy for a man to be for women’s rights, but not take a hard stance on the issue. Women in America largely have a good amount of rights and privileges afforded to them. Although I am not trying to make little the very real need for life of women in America to continue to improve, I have heard female pcvs say that they feel lucky to have been born American. I also feel that same sense of luck, but I can only imagine what life would be like if I were born a woman in this country.

Although what I write cannot generalize for all women and all families in Uganda, it is so astoundingly true for the large majority of women that I am going to summarize what I have seen while here. In most homes and districts, women are second-class citizens. With the exception of some few very modern families and communities, which exist almost exclusively in the capital and major urban areas, the role of women is very clearly defined and very clearly beneath that of men. Women take care of the home and the children and men earn the money. However, in many cases men don’t even allow the women to see money or hold spending money, which is usually used on the children or home needs.  It is generally assumed that a good husband controls his wife and a good wife is submissive to his husband. This is believed by both men, and more vocally, by the women themselves. I have heard  surprisingly more women tell me how necessary it is for the wife to tend the kids, cook, clean, and produce as many offspring as she can. I recently helped to organize a gender-based violence workshop and was shocked at some of the information I heard. A higher percentage of women than men believe that wife beating is justified if the women has done something wrong. What!? Now I will say I have heard men speak out against these sorts of things and talk with respect for women. However, that does not mean they will go as far as to say the wife could work and make more money than he, or that he Is willing to take care of the home, or that dowry and bride price should stop (this is the payment with cows and goats for a wife by the groom’s family to the bride’s, which remains a cultural tradition), or that women are as strong as men. This is where I have really had a change in my own mindset on the issue.

I have never been a fan of gender norms, but I knew that living in a very traditional culture I would be in contact with them constantly and it would not be my place to change them. After all, gender roles exist for a reason and were useful when societies first began growing; someone does need to get food and someone else does need to prepare it and look after the kids. However, we no longer live in the Stone Age and with occupations now relying on mental abilities and not physical ones, those roles do not need to be assigned to genders, rather should be discussed in a family unit and assigned to individuals based on ability and preference. What really gets me is the still given excuse that women are physically weaker than men. Before coming to Uganda I had heard that argument and did not really try and go against it. Although I am not sure I believed it, it seemed like it could be true. Just look in any gym class and the majority of boys can outdo a majority of girls in physical activities. Then I came to Uganda, where this excuse is given way more than in the US. This time, when I look around at women in Uganda I see nothing but strength. Forget that they endure so much more hardship than their male counterparts, being that they have to suffer from rape, abuse, domineering husbands, and a society that treats them like property. They also do so much more physically. When I see people digging in the garden for hours, it is usually the women. When I see someone carrying a load (think really big) of firewood on their head for long distances or a 20 liter jerrycan filled with water for the home, it is usually a woman. I have even seen a lady carry an entire bedframe on her head with such grace and a smile on her face. Women carry their babies during all of this in sacks on their backs and they do it all day long. After gardening, the man will go in and sit and wait while the woman prepares a meal and then cleans after. Women are the ones giving birth to upwards of 10 children in their lifetime and can’t refuse even if she wanted to. So when I hear that a woman can’t build a pit latrine or earn money for the home because she isn’t as strong as a man, my blood now boils .Women in Uganda are some of the strongest people I have ever met and they take so much from their culture. Again, I am not trying to say things on a cultural level need to change, but it is about time that women receive the respect and recognition they deserve for being the outstanding individuals they are.

Normalized

It is has been a really long time since I wrote anything, actually it has been since right before I went home for Christmas and there is a reason for that. I had such a wonderful time at home with my family and friends, drinking Dunkin Donuts, seeing the city, eating really good food, and playing in the snow. It was like a refresher, giving me everything my body and soul needed to take on another year in Uganda. It certainly helped that I had left UG with very positive thoughts and did not fear going back. Once I did get back I was quickly very busy with conferences and trainings and seeing my friends here. I was getting involved in quite many things and soon realized that year 2 is incredibly more productive than year 1. I knew it was going to fly by. What I did not expect was how normal life was going to feel after I came back. I had become used to my routines, used to the environment and the people, the ups were great and the downs were humorous afterwards. I was interacting with people as if I had known them for years. I finally felt comfortable being uncomfortable and living here felt like I was home.

That is the reason I have not written anything—I don’t know what to write about. I did not blog back in the States about everyday things and I did not feel the need to write about what was happening here because it felt to everyday. My life here became just that, living in Uganda. It was no longer a “peace corps experience.” Of course I am still having those incredible moments, but what has happened is they have become more a part of an incredible life rather than isolated events in an otherwise uneventful existence. When I hop onto a taxi to go to Mbale and causally make conversation with whoever is sitting near me, I do still get off and take a breath with the thought in mind—I live in Africa. I feel so blessed and fortunate and I am trying really hard not to take it for granted, because in 6 short months I won’t ever be living in Africa again (well, never say never I guess.)

Since coming back from home, I have had the chance to work closely with my PC office staff, whom I have grown to really love, on LGBT issues. I prepared and helped to facilitate a gender-based violence workshop for volunteers and their counterparts. I have traveled deep into the village to train a group of passionate people who want to start a trade school for girls who dropped out of school because of early pregnancy. I have attended and helped to carry out a regional HIV workshop with so many wonderful groups. I withstood the passing of an evil bill and the following support of it. I have traveled to new parts of this beautiful country, including climbing a mountain that rests on the border of Uganda, Rwanda, and DRC. I worked with student teachers to organize a school-wide Drop Everything And Read day. I have partied, relaxed, laughed, been bored, cried, and had hopes come crash down on me. All in all, my life here is great and when I look back on where I was emotionally one year ago I am so humbled by what this country has done to me, how I have grown, and so grateful to my incredibly intelligent and supportive friends who stuck by me and told me to keep going. In the next few months, I have even more big plans that I think are actually going to make an impact on my community and I am so excited for whatever happens. Even if things don’t work out the way you want them to, they work out the way they are supposed to. I love Uganda, even with all its many faults. I have reconciled with the fact that I am a visitor here, it is not my land. Everything that feels foreign to me should, I am the foreigner. Who am I to demand change or say that something is wrong, this is not the United States. But I can empathize with people and empower them to make the changes they think need to be made. There are many real problems here, most to do with corruption and abuse of power, but there is hope.